A couple months ago, Bryan and I decided to create care boxes for families who lose a baby at our local hospital. I put a lot of work into them, people gave us money to help cover the costs and I did my best to include all the things I thought would make the time in the hospital a little less hard.
Here are some photos:
We've been waiting to hear back from them about when we could bring them in, and I just got a call from the social worker from the hospital.
I'm speechless.
Apparently, "after much consideration", the care boxes we made for the hospital will not be accepted! They won't use them.
wow
Way to leave families without any support during the worst time of their lives.
I could just throw up.
We made them for our hospital because they didn't seem to know what to do when we were there. I didn't want another family to feel like we did. I guess they don't understand.
(This is the same hospital that requires social worker visits in the office with new babies/pregnant mamas after a woman has lost her baby. (Dummies)).
I don't know whether to cry or go shake them into understanding.
The boxes are all made and ready to go. Now what do I do with them?
I need to go process this...
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Follow-up: see here for more of the story.
Oh my WORD! I am speechless and furious. I would call around to other hospitals. Hospitals NEED to have something like this! Mine didn't, but Missing Grace brought the basket. I feel like hospitals should be so receptive of this kind of thing! Man, I'm at a loss. So sorry, friend. :(
ReplyDeleteThanks Erin. Would you be willing to write out your thoughts/story for me? I plan to gather as many stories of how these types of care boxes help a mama at the hospital and then give them to the staff at the hospital and the newspaper. Thanks!
DeleteWow wow wow. I swear, I would be mad enough to call the local news station! What reason did they give?! These boxes are too beautiful. Is there no other close hospital?
ReplyDeleteSadly, there are not many other options for hospitals within 50 miles.
DeleteThat is terrible. Maybe another local hospital will take them? I can't believe they won't accept them. What was their reasoning? I know many people who have donated boxes to hospitals. I think they would be grateful to have them. I'm so sorry.
ReplyDeleteOh I am so sorry! What a beautiful thing you are doing in Samuel's name!
ReplyDeleteMaybe there are churches that could use them, so that Pastors have something to bring to families in their congregation who might be going through this.
Jen
ps-I found you through Erin!
Jen, Thank you so much! If we are unable to get the hospital on board, that's a great idea!
DeleteReanne, After our chat and all things considered, I also have an "In" at the Mankato Free Press......If you want to go that route and see what may come of that, you have my full support. I am still trying to process this, and plan to back you until these precious gifts get in the hands of the people who need them.
ReplyDeleteAre there any "Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep" photographers in your area? They may be willing to deliver the boxes if they get called in. I know many of the photographers appreciate having something to hand to the families. *sigh* This hospital needs training.
ReplyDeleteour NILMDTS photographer, Sherry, is helping to get them in our hospital. I hope to help them realize what families need during this time.
DeleteI stumbled upon this after seeing a link on Facebook. I can't believe they denied that! Is there a way for us to get the hospital's information to formally complain about this? We got a care package when our son died .. & it was such a comfort to know that someone cared that our baby died. These families NEED this.
ReplyDeleteThanks Leslie. Would you be willing to write out your thoughts/story for me? I plan to gather as many stories of how these types of care boxes help a mama at the hospital and then give them to the staff at the hospital and the newspaper. You can email it to me: RememberingSamuelEvan@gmail.com Thanks!
DeleteAbsolutely! It's a bit late tonight but I will write something up & send it off to you as soon as I can.
DeleteTHAT IS AWFUL!!! I saw this on FB and, as a bereaved parent 3x over, the boxes we got at the hospital were VERY helpful to us, and we still treasure them. I'd find another hospital to donate them to!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment Michele. Would you be willing to write out your thoughts/story for me? I plan to gather as many stories of how these types of care boxes help a mama at the hospital and then give them to the staff at the hospital and the newspaper. You can email it to me: RememberingSamuelEvan@gmail.com Thanks!
DeleteThis makes me very sad. I don't know what I would have done had we not gotten a memory box from the hospital when we lost our daughter. What is their reasoning behind not accepting them? There cannot be a reason good enough not to.
ReplyDeleteKelly, They told me it has to do with health safety (I don't really believe them...) Would you be willing to write out your thoughts/story for me? I plan to gather as many stories of how these types of care boxes help a mama at the hospital and then give them to the staff at the hospital and the newspaper. You can email it to me: RememberingSamuelEvan@gmail.com Thanks!
DeleteOh my goodness. Please post the info for the hospital. I would like to contact them to let them know what a fabulous resource the are passing up. Specifically the social worker. I am so thankful for all of the things we received from the hospital when our Eli died. This hurts my feelings and makes,me a little angry. I am so sorry mama. This is just wrong.
ReplyDeleteI like your idea! Would you be willing to write out your thoughts/story for me? I plan to gather as many stories of how these types of care boxes help a mama at the hospital and then give them to the staff at the hospital and the newspaper. You can email it to me: RememberingSamuelEvan@gmail.com Thanks!
DeleteI'm so sorry to hear this. I wonder what they stated their reasons to be? They are beautiful, and were clearly assembled with much love. Though I wish no one ever would have to get one, they could be such a blessing to those who have lost. So sorry mama.
ReplyDeleteI just read your post with disbelief! I had NOTHING from my hospital when I had my stillborn son back in 1975 and again in 1982 when I had my stillborn daughter! What would I given to have had one of your care boxes! It would have meant the world to me! This social worker and hospital are lacking in thoughtfulness for what their patients need emotionally! Wow! I thought during the past 37 years things were getting better for parents who lose their babies. Apparently not. THANK YOU for your thoughtfulness and proper actions! What state are you from? Hugs to you! Gale
ReplyDeleteThis is sad. Having experienced a miscarriage early on in my pregnancy I was personally so surprised at how much a gift basket from the missing grace group touched my life. This basket gave me things in my home that make me smile every time I see them and remind me that I get to look forward to meeting that baby one day in heaven. I recently gave this same basket to another mom friend who suffered a miscarriage and it was just as much as a blessing for her and her family to have these special items. I hope they will realize the importance of these types of things to help aid the healing process in the near future. Had I not been blessed with this basket I wouldn't have realized how much it helped to know people cared and put time and thought into thinking about us and helping us preserve the memory of this baby.
ReplyDelete*bloodboiling* For shame! Ugh! WAKE UP HOSPITAL!
ReplyDelete(Hi, I'm Kara and I'm one of Angela's bloggy friends.)
I'm with Gale, there were no memory boxes or anything of the sort after my daughter died in 1995. I would have cherished it all these years. Of course I support getting the hospital on board. They obviously understand the need for support or they would not let NILMDTS in the rooms so why they would not except these beautiful boxes are beyond me. I think this should go viral and expose the need of support in the hospital because I am sure your hospital is not the only one. I would suggest also giving a few boxes to your OB/Gyn office for those parents that are told in the office their baby has passed.
ReplyDeleteThanks for supporting others!